Mealtime Monsters

We do our best to try to teach some manners and general social etiquette around meal times, but who are we kidding? Nobody in this house has attended finishing school. Peyton gets more and more active everyday. As I'm sitting here she's using her small chair to climb into the windowsill and then dancing in the middle of their small table. That was tonight's mealtime activity too. Tonight, rather than correct, correct, correct, I decided to sit back and let it happen. Soon enough they'll be teenagers with their own activities that interrupt dinner, but not yet. Here was the conversation at dinner tonight:

Libby Peyton Me

"Peyton, are you a Scottish festival?"

"Yeah."

"Do you have balloons?"

"Yeah."

"Can you share your balloons?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, here's your ticket. (pretends to hand out tickets) J. R. B. S."

(Car honks. Grunden Barks.)

"Mom, who honked?"

"Someone next door."

"I bet they changed. I bet they changed their furniture. Peyton...... are you normal?"

"Yeah."

(Peyton falls out of her chair, cries and climbs onto my lap.)

"Peytie, look at me. Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

"Are you a boo boo?"

"Yeah."

"Peytie, look."

(Libby opens her mouth to show Peyton her chewed food, then continues to eat)

"Mom, how will I brush my teeth when I'm bigger and I lose my teeth?"

"Um..... you'll brush the ones you still have."

"Peytie, can you share your......"

(Libby doesn't wait for an answer before she begins to eat from Peyton's plate.)

"Yeah. Mommy, mine. Mine, Mommy. Mommy, mine."

"Peyton, are you going pee pee?"

"Hey, no more pee talk at the table, please."

"Pee pee pee pee pee pee pee pee pee pee......."

(Libby bites her napkin and smiles at Peyton who proceeds to rip the napkin out of Libby's teeth tearing it into pieces. They do this a few times. Peyton slaps Libby in the face. Libby seems not to mind and giggles. Libby then spins sideways and turns upside down in her chair with her head under the table, feet waving in the air. Peyton attempts to climb onto Libby, but falls short and lands on the floor. I correct all behavior and tell the little monsters to....)

"Everyone, eat."

"Done."

"Me too. I'm done too, Mom."

Meal over. Mom tired.