April Fools

I'm going to start by saying I thought today would be the perfect day to announce that a vasectomy isn't immediately effective and we're expecting our third child. But, I didn't want to be responsible for the panic that might ensue thereafter. Also, I'd like those who are providing childcare for us next fall to stick around. I talked to my friend Melissa who gave that very news in a voice mail to her husband, and I've not yet heard the outcome. Melissa, call me. I'm dying to know.

So, instead of pulling a prank on you, turns out I'm the fool. And my kids are in charge of this circus. Here's how it went down:

If you're squeamish about poop, stop reading here. Peyton loves the potty. She likes the lid. She likes to flush. She likes to touch the seat and then put her hands in her (cringe) mouth. She uses it for climbing, and she's learning to use it for it's intended use. Last night after Libby used it, Peyton insisted on her turn. I removed her diaper to find she'd already pooped. Tricky, but not impossible. I set her on the pot and immediately squatted on the floor to roll up her diaper. Apparently, the fact that she'd already pooped changed the (ahem) trajectory of things. I turned to look at her just as she "pushed out a pee". Everything happened so fast, but I know I screamed, because when the pee hit me in the face my mouth was open. Yep, open. My scream must've sent her into a panic because she came flying off the potty like it had set her little buns on fire. I'm pretty sure I caught her mid air because we managed to avoid any further mess. I did however, spend the next five minutes spitting into the garbage can.

Then, today while the girls were riding their bikes outside I found (in the garage) a sippy cup. It must've had juice in it, because it was full of sugar ants. Most were dead, though a few were still fighting for their lives. Gross. I set it on a shelf, but realized if I left it there I'd likely forget to bring it inside to wash (and sterilize) it.

{Note to self: Next time, throw it away right when you find it.}

So I moved it to a spot where I'd see it when I walked back inside, and continued sweeping out the garage. I turned to put the broom away just in time to watch Peyton take a drink. From the sippy cup. The one with the ants. Some dead and some still alive. Blech! We went inside and I had her guzzle some water to dilute any liquid that may have gone down. Now, Libby has developed a phobia of ants. She imagines they're crawling everywhere and she could barely walk on the floors in the house today. When I asked her if she wanted to have a rest in our bed and watch t.v. she asked, "Are there ants in your bed?" Sigh.

I'm happy to say we ended better than we started. We topped off the day with dinner from Toshi's Ramen and ate with chop sticks.