Binky Be Gone

A while ago I posted multiple blogs about The Binky Blues at our house. I'd started snipping miniscule pieces from the tip of Libby's binky until there was nothing that Libby could even grip in her teeth. She loved that binky. And, to be honest, I loved the sucking sound she made coming over the baby monitor at night. It was the sound of a quiet, content, secure, happy, sleeping baby which meant we, her parents, also had a shot at a decent night's sleep. Libby had a few meltdowns over the fact that it didn't work the way it used to, so I attached a snap to her favorite blanket and each night, though she couldn't suck it, she refused to go to bed without it securely attached. Sometimes finding it required lengthy searches, something I claimed (before I ever had children) that I'd never do. Okay. I give. Fair enough. You want to sleep with a binky till you're in college? I can live with that, as long as it's not doing damage to your jaw structure. I'm not fighting this battle. The binky is yours. It helped that Peyton never took a binky, except to antagonized her older sister by stealing hers and running away with it between clenched teeth with a gleam in her eye. Therefore, when we were down to only one remaining bink, that's all we had. No backup.

Well, this week I couldn't be happier that I never took her binky away from her, for our sweet girl gave it away all on her own. Mark and Amy came for dinner with baby Ella, and Libby gave Ella her only remaining binky. It seemed not to bother her a bit. For me, it was huge. I wanted to say, "Are you SURE you're ready to do that!?" Maybe I did say that. I don't exactly remember. But I do know my girl is making a move toward being a full blown kid. Independent. Empathetic. A member of society. A little less self-centered than that which is the definition of infancy.

Dude.

Okay, I know all she did was give up a tiny piece of plastic, but that's the thing with parenthood. You're not prepared for how these tiny pivotal moments of regular life will amaze you and make you so proud.

I will say this, though. For all the urging to give that binky away, I didn't know how much I wanted to keep it. I texted Amy the next day, arranged a quick meeting, and now the binky is forever a part of our family history. It turns out I was the one who couldn't give it up....

Binky Blues....

Nap time:

It finally happened. After snipping miniscule pieces from the tip of Libby's binky for weeks now, she finally realized where we're headed, and had a meltdown of nuclear proportions this afternoon. It doesn't help that all four of us have had colds in the last week, and we spent the afternoon running errands that none of us wanted to do. At nap time Peyton went down easily (Thank You), and I sat holding Libby in her bed for close to an hour. It was a pretty one sided conversation we had. It went something like this:

"I don't like it get smaaaaaaaaaaaller."

"I don't want to be threeeeeeeeeeeee."

"I wanna turn twooooooooooooooooo."

"I don't like to have a biiiiiiiiirrrrrrrthdaaaaaaaaaay."

"I don't like the binky fairy takin' my biiiiiiiiiinkyyyyyyyyyyy."

"I want my lellow biiiiiiiiinkyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy."

"I don't like my binky get smaaaaaaaaaaaaalleeeeeeeeeerrrrrrr."

I held her and loved her, and resisted the temptation to go get her a binky hidden in the drawer of Peyton's dresser. She finally fell asleep. Victory. I'm hoping bed time will be better, but if not, we'll do it all over again........

Bed time:

Bedtime went much better. Libby got to stay up a little late because she napped forever after all of that crying. She gave me one little whine, but stopped after I reminded her that Daddy's taking her for a doughnut in the morning. We are on our way to becoming a BINKY FREE HOME!

Bye Bye Binky

Every once in a while something big will happen in our family and I'll respond by writing a letter to the girls that they can read when they get older. I wrote this to Libby last night after having serious remorse about..... well, read ahead and you'll see. Then, read to the bottom of the post and you'll see how Libby responded.....

Dear Libby,

I just snipped the tip off of your only remaining binky. After I did it, I almost cried because I tried to suck on it, and the suction is all gone. It won’t work anymore. I know this will be so hard for you. You love that binky, and have for a really long time. I know we have to get rid of it. It won’t serve to comfort you without actually doing damage, so as responsible parents wanting the best for you, we can’t continue to let you have it. Still, as I sit here listening to bath time squeals between you, Peyton and Daddy I’m afraid that in 40 minutes, at bedtime, you may be about to face the toughest moment in your three years of life. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry, because this will only be the first of many tough moments, and I want to shelter you from all of them. Even as I know it will serve you better to prepare you than to shelter you at this moment, I want to take it back. Repair the binky. Go get one of the two I’ve hidden in the dresser after we told you the Binky Fairy came and got them. Instead, I’m sure you’re going to cry and I’ll cry along with you. For your lifetime and mine, I’ll cry along with you. To Dad and I you’re the most incredible three year old on the planet. We’ll get through this one together and all those trials that’ll come your way after this one. I love you.

Love, Mom

After the anguish over what I'd done, Shane and I watched her like a hawk at bedtime. First, she searched among her blankets for her binky. Then, she asked where it was. I got it off of the shelf it was on and handed it to her. She put it in her mouth like every other night night and went to bed. Talk about anticlimactic. All of that anguish for nothing. I'll be snipping off a tiny bit each day. Bye bye binky.......